Sorry to blog twice in one day

World Challenge and my book.
That's all I've been thinking about all day.
Making people proud is all I want to do right now.
I went through so much during World Challenge, and I can only imagine what my leaders went through watching me deal with it. I want to experience that feeling of excitement, and accomplishment.
So World Challenge leader is what I've been aiming for for a long time, and now it's for real.

I also want you to read a poem that I am very proud of. The title is "Four Years" but like the poem that needs some work. Constructive criticism is always accepted.

Fly away on the wings of a dove,
Never again do I want to love.
So I wrote at the age of sixteen,
All the things you did and said
All they did was demean.

Four years have passed since that day
And even if I think I'm fixed,
I still have no words to say.

Six attempts down the line,
The last one eleven days past.
Take it as fate,
Claim everything's fine.

Love will tear us apart,
Or so we have been told.
So why this pressure?
To find the one before we grow old.

"I'll be there forever" you said,
False words and promises,
I lay in my room dead.

You promised you'd do it too,
That if we left together,
Then all our pain would be through.
But you never did,
A plight to kill me?
You've failed Mr. Burbidge.

This is my final goodbye,
If I don't make it through the night,
You'll know why.

But then again,
I've proved myself a fighter.
My hate for you is far too strong,
But those four years have made me a little lighter.

My thoughts are confused,
For once again I have loved and lost.
But after the initial pain,
No one else will suffer at my cost.

Think of this what you will,
A new beginning
A symbol of strength,
I am something you will not kill.


What do you think?



One Tree Hill is exciting me about new relationships and first dates. I hate to sound cheesy but I am finally ready to properly move on.

One Tree Hill

I'm on my fifth episode of the day (I don't actually have a life, just to let you know) and have discovered that I want Lucas Scott's life. Not the whole falling in love with a not very pretty girl thing. But writing a story about my life, a great epic story. And it being so loved that the world is turned upside down by it.


If I can't have that, can I have Chad Michael Murray instead please?




Thank you :)

Everything is going wrong but we're so happy!

Actually, nothing is going wrong, in fact things are going pretty amazingly right now. I am so thankful that this summer is all about chilling and writing, plus the occasional shift. Working full time at the food court last summer killed my soul; it was the most miserable summer of my life. Apart from the parties and occasional night out, Portugal and Edinburgh it was pretty dump. But it could have been worse seeing as one of my best friends spent her summer in bed dying (not literally but she was pretty sodding ill)
Anyway this summer has already made up for '08. Last night was so amazing, too lovely for words. Nat and I just sat in the middle of open countryside watching the sunset over the fields, whilst having some cider and shandy and deep conversations about life and the future. It was so gorgeous; and it really made us realise just how beautiful this town can be. It sounds lame, it's only Ellon after all. Most people just give us sympathetic looks when we tell them where we're from, if they're one of the few who knows where it is. But really, whilst there's nothing much to do, and they don't cater for the young adults at all on the clubbing front, it really is beautiful.



We also came up with the perfect idea for my first novel, along with a title and the last words. I am so excited to start it, it's actually getting started after this blog.
I really haven't felt this positive about everything in a long time and I absolutely love it. So there are a few things going wrong, but I'm coping and dealing with them the way I need to. But I am clearly not letting it get me down. Life is good right now, too good for words. I am very excited for this summer and the future too; it's bright!

Also, in Nat's words "it's like 6th year all over again" if we're talking about my love life here. I find it all very funny that I've reverted back to this. Honestly if I'd bumped into him 4 months ago I wouldn't have been so depressed about it all. Oh well, what is meant to be will be.

So I'm away to go start my first novel, and put some moisturiser on my very sunburnt neck.

Toodles :)